Acceptence

Language is a beautiful thing. The way its patterns and structure also have so many

subtleties and nuances. We can talk about the “i before e” rule all day! But in my opinion, the magical part of language is the varied meanings within context that can lead to discovery.

I was having one of my shower thought sessions (see Blog Post #3) about the concept of

acceptance and thought of how impactful this has been to me in my own personal growth.

When we think of the most widely known definition of acceptance, we think of the societal

construct of fitting in or welcoming people. We are often preoccupied with whether our image is presentable, if we said the right thing, or if we have had the intended effect on who we speak with. We may think of this in terms of accepting a gift or another person’s opinion.

In psychology, the idea of acceptance is quite different. We try to reconcile that our

experience has been contrary to what we envisioned and gather it up to move forward

toward the outcome we initially wanted or perhaps didn’t have. In recovery and mental health, our experiences in the past are often difficult to understand, and it is important not to get stuck in that knowledge, letting it become a barrier to building the life we want. That we deserve.

Acceptance has nothing to do with forgiveness or forgetting. It’s not an exercise in being the bigger person or letting something that bothers us slide. It’s simply acknowledging that there are things that have happened or are influencing our state of mind that we have no control over. There might be things in the past that we wish had been different, but we can’t change it now. There may be upcoming events that we are anticipating that will cause discomfort. When we accept that these uncomfortable things exist, we can make space for them. Enough space that we can hit a pause button and think about how we can navigate them in a way that alleviates the discomfort, instead of just delaying or avoiding.

The act of acceptance is the act of gaining power. It’s engaging in thoughts, emotions, and

interactions that are hard, but the outcome is much more pleasant than pretending it’s not

there. The outcome is self-awareness and growth. And I highly recommend.